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selling our souls
for the illusion of love
is a much more common practice
than most of us are ready to admit
….
to be there for anyone
is not a matter of decisions
nor intentions
if what the someone needs
is not in our power
to give
….
accepting our limits
and weaknesses
might be
the shortest way
to peace
when every observation
even the most tender one
is being perceived
as an attack
communication becomes
if not impossible
then highly simplistic
and purely unilateral
being told to shut your mouth
is neither very elegant
nor very pleasant
all the more
that the reason to speak out
was never to harm anyone
rather the shy expression of
a deep longing for forgiveness
forgiveness
as repentance
is only possible
once the fault is recognised as such
feeling responsible
for the emotional state of others
may that be
a close relation
or passing strangers
can easily turn into
a daily
nightmare
when the responsibility
for one’s own emotional state
is skipped in the equation
being unable to perceive
one’s own needs
and interests
is not only harmful
it is overpoweringly sad
when acting becomes
the solution to everything
life is being fragmented into decisions
where grief has no reason to be
as if everything was possible to change
even death
which is in the end
the only thing
none of us can
escape
so much emotional pain
mounting to the surface
that standing erect can be
nothing but
an inner disposition
after having tried for too long to do
everything right
in order to get rid of the feeling of being
wrong
being unable to reach
beyond one’s own needs
and interests
is not only harmful
it is overpoweringly sad
there is nothing glamorous
in the feeling
of being
a burden
nothing nourishing
nothing uplifting
there is only weighing down
till the bottom has been touched
and something beyond
can finally crack open