no longer to await
the future
in fear of the past
but living the present
as a
fulfilment of
the past
and a promise for
the future
healing
what was
by living what is
and receiving what comes
graciously
glittering
glittering water
and a golden horizon
opening broader
and broader
towards
mercy
where guilt
had reigned
aware
becoming aware
there is a choice
to be made
between guilt
and mercy
and being given
the freedom
to choose
anchor point
ending
a whole long life
of submission
to guilt
can feel
slightly
disorientating
until mercy has
settled
in its anchor point
revered
when the confusion
of feeling
misunderstood
is anew
stirring the heart
only to emphasise
how
there is a time
to talk
a time to keep quiet
a time
to listen
there is indeed
a time
for everything
yet when the time is not revered
confusion occurs
familiar
that particular
all too familiar
sensation
of frustrated impatience
which occurs
while we are losing something
that is no longer
needed
without feeling
entirely ready
to let go
inferiority
there might be
a certain melancholy
while leaving behind
the feeling of inferiority
which in its own way
can be considered
as stepping out
of pride
head under water
holding others responsible
for our own flaws
is like blaming others
for our own weaknesses
being hurt
by such accusations
is like living
head under water
in an open wound
unable to touch
the truth
undefined
suddenly perceiving
what
was so far experienced
as a punishment
for undefined misbehaviour
to be a merciful blessing
perhaps even a privilege
might be
the outcome of
transformation
at times
layers upon layers
of shame
coming to the surface
it can seem endless
at times
and somehow
it is
yet
it is
in this purification
of shame
mercy increases
and freedom expands